Benny and his friend Griffin at Ocean Beach in San Francisco.

Thursday, April 01, 2004

Bizarre Napping Rituals

I'm finally joining the real world again. Baby Ben is getting bigger, I'm finally feeling better, and spring is FINALLY here. He's sleeping on his activity mat right now (one of those big square pads with dangly toys hanging above).

I keep hearing about these moms and their elaborate napping rituals:
1. Swaddle kid
2. Turn on special lullaby CD
3. Sway for 20 minutes
4. Rock for 20 minutes
5. Put kid in crib
6. Turn on special light-and-music gizmo
7. Lower lights to prescribed level
8. Tiptoe out while holding breath
9. Break into liquor cabinet (Oops, that’s me)

Repeat five times daily.

Some mothers watch their babies like hawks for special signs of tiredness. "If the baby is fussy, it's too late," they say. Is the baby rubbing his eyes? Bobbing his head? Breathing slower? I bet there's a gal in Albany N.Y. taking her baby's blood pressure every hour to identify the optimal nap time.

My kid has "Nap Attacks,” dropping wherever he happens to be when the attack hits. Sometimes he's in his swing, sometimes he's in my arms, sometimes he's in the carseat or on his mat. I usually just leave him wherever he is and cover him up. I don't know, maybe I'm courting disaster and sentencing Ben to a life with insomnia, restless legs, sleep apnea, night sweats and bedwetting.


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