I Don't WANT to be Special!

I just wrote this note to BIC USA:

"I just bought a pack of Comfort 3 Pivot razors. They were pink, they had three blades, good enough for me. I didn't realize they would smell like berries. Is this really necessary? Has Bic lost its mind? What makes your company think that American women LIKE their razors to smell like berries? It's nausea-inducing, really. I couldn't wait to wash the smell off my hands. I'm a working mother and now on top of everything else I have to think about, now I have to make sure my razors don't smell?"

Now these razors will join the no-sodium chicken soup, the celery-and-green-pepper diced tomatos and the garlic crescent rolls as yet another stupid special version I've bought this week. I have to check any product's packaging three times before buying it, lest I end up with diet tomato sauce or lime-flavored tortilla chips. Gross!

That's It, No More Sports

I think Benny's been watching too much sports on TV.

At dinner tonight:

ME:
... So It sounds like that poor lady has a real problem ...

BENNY:
Got a problem? Ask your doctor about FLOMAX!

2009 Review

This seems like an appropriate time to review the Good, the Bad and the Ugly of 2009. It was a tough year for everybody, but we're still here at the end, reasonably secure and healthy. Compared to the train wrecks of 2007 and 2008, we're doing great.




BOO HOO
- The sale of our house last year resulted in an angst-ridden month working with our tax accountant and a $3,000 tax bill.
- Four credit card companies imposed giant APR hikes on our balances, requiring four letters to “opt out” and close the cards.
- Ron's workload went beyond heavy and passed into frightening,
- Ron and I got a 5 percent pay cut. (However, my hours are not reduced, and that's very good.)
- We still can't get a car. This drives me crazy.
- We can't go to Michigan for Christmas.


CELEBRATE!
- BENNY GOT INTO LUCKY ELEMENTARY! YAY! Logistically, financially and yes,
educationally, this is the best thing that could happen to us..
- Benny leaves the Dinosaur preschool, eliminating a $1,500/month expense. (yeah, I know.)
- I celebrated our improved cash flow for buying new, shockingly expensive glasses.
- First family vacation in three years to Mt. Lassen
- Benny and I read all three books of "The Lord of the Rings."
- I finished a big fat book about the Franco-Prussian War.
- I started sending my science fiction novel to literary agents.
- I started a new novel: "The Fred Code."
- Benny no longer has to meet with the endocrinologist after two years of a good growth curve.
- Ron finished a corporate Wellness Plan and received $500, which he spent on new work clothes and an iPhone. He's crazy about his iPhone. After two weeks, it suddenly went dead and he couldn't figure out why. So I did some Googling and found the answer. So Ron can thank me and some weird online guy named Hoof Arted for fixing his iPhone.
- I bullied AT&T into giving me a new computer modem for free after the old one died in November. They wanted to charge me $80!

How was your year?

A Nice NaNo Moment

Ron and I started today with a nice moment. We're stumbling around the apartment half-awake, and suddenly I have a question.

CHRISTINE
Hey Ron, do Protestant churches allow funerals for suicides?

RON
What?

CHRISTINE
Do Protestant churches allow funerals for suicides. The Catholic Church calls it a mortal sin.

RON
Uh. yes.

CHRISTINE
Good.

(short pause)

RON
... WHY!!!

CHRISTINE
For my mystery novel.

RON
Oh.

Happy Halloween!

Festivities began Friday morning with a school parade down the neighborhood business district. I camped outside a Tully's beforehand and shot some pictures as they passed.

Then I stepped out with Benny Saturday night for some Trick-or-Treating fun. We started with a party hosted by Dinosaur Preschool parents. Then some of us refreshed our wine glasses and hit the streets with our kids. This is a big night for San Francisco and I only regret I didn't take pictures of random pedestrians.

Benny dressed as a ninja and his friend Quinn was a dinosaur. By the end of the night, their pumpkin pails were so full the boys could hardly carry them. Benny refused to let me carry any of his candy. (Probably afraid I'd eat some -- he knows me so well.) I asked him where he would put candy now, since his pail was overflowing.

"I'll stuff the candy in my pockets," he said matter-of-factly. And he did.

National Novel Writing Month 2009

In a fit of insanity, I've decided to write a novel in a month again. I've joined National Novel Writing Month and have begun my first murder mystery. Think "Da Vinci Code" meets "Our Town."

The working title is "The Fred Code" and you can track my progress and read the novel here:

Here's the synopsis:

Local historian and general nutcase Fred Stark has been found dead in his beloved, lovingly restored 18th-century courthouse in the small town of Winslow, Michigan. The suicide note beside his body is packed with obscure historical references, prompting beleaguered police chief Skippy Bronson to call for expert help.

Enter Leda Morris, part-time history teacher, closet organizer and organizing freak. She never could stand Fred, who was her ex-fiance's uncle and a self-described "sixth-generation Winslowite." But the note is intriguing— and almost completely incomprehensible — and she finds herself researching the clues despite herself. Leda and her ex, Jeffrey Stark, attempt to sort out the bizarre riddles and follow a trail of clues hidden in “historic sites” throughout the town.

So welcome to Winslow, Mich., population 4,947, barely limping along economically since the Dodge air-conditioning vent factory closed in '92. Meet Winslow's secret, ruthless Society and learn about this small town's most valuable historic relic.

Wish me luck!

Take an Aspirin

Ron's causing trouble over at Bayer Corp.

Vacation Pictures!

Yes, at last, the long-anticipated vacation pictures from our road trip to Mt. Lassen. Here we are:

Here are some shots of Burney Falls, just north of Mt. Lassen Volcanic Park. Then we have Ron and Benny by Emerald Lake, a glacial lake near Mt. Lassen. The next picture is Mt. Lassen. Ron and Benny are beside King's Creek. Benny and I are next to a glacial erratic (a boulder that was carried a long way by a glacier and has no relation to the rocks beneath). We end with a weird feature near the summit of Mt. Lassen called the Vulcan's Eye.